Lil Bitty Baby
by TempestJo
Summary: Booth and Brennan prepare for the new arrival.
1. Chapter 1

"Booth, our child will not be wearing that. It's hardly appropriate for a baby."

He sighed and put the little white shirt with "demolition expert" written across it in a red scrawl down. "Why Bones? Babies are very destructive!"

"But they are not experts Booth- that would require years of training with highly volatile chemicals. I like this one better." She held up yellow shirt with ducks on it.

"Ducks? Bones, I hate birds!"

"No." She corrected him, placing the shirt in the basket. "You're afraid of them, there is a difference."

He took the shirt out of the basket and put it back on the shelf. "No ducks."

"Booth! The ducks are the only things scientifically correct in this store!" She waved her hand at the racks of pink elephants and blue bears.

"Not true!" He wagged his finger at her and produced a shirt with a green frog on it.

"Is that meant to represent how infants sleep?" She frowned at it.

"I don't think so." His eyebrows went up. "They do kind of look like little frogs though now that you mention it, their butts up in the air."

"The latest research recommends infants sleep on their bellies, unless supervised, at which time they are supposed to be strengthening their neck and arm muscles."

"Tummy tiiiiiiime..." Booth nodded. "So its a yes? Green frog, in the basket?"

"Fine."

"Great." He added it and then clapped his hands together. "Whats next? Sleepers? Jolly Jumper?"

Brennan sniffed the air. "French fries."

"But Bones, the baby will be here in a few months and all we've bought is a frog shirt and this is our third trip!"

She nodded and handed the basket to him. "French Fries. With ketchup. And gravy. Maybe they have poutine here. Do you think they have Poutine Booth?" She started heading for the restaurant at the edge of the store. "Buy everything with green frogs on it Booth."

He nodded and turned to the hovering salesgirl, passing her the basket. "Load'er up! Green frogs, on the double!" Then he sniffed the air. "Do you know if that place sells pie?"


	2. Chapter 2

CH

"Booth, I really think we should choose yellow."

"I hate yellow."

"Why? It's a cheerful unisex colour which warms up a space by insinuating that the room is full of sunlight." Brennan pointed at the blurb at the top of the paint chip sheet.

"Let's paint it white." He flipped the page of the Hockey News. "Then it will match anything."

"Too sterile." Brennan shook her head. "I don't want the baby to feel as if it's in a test tube lab." She sat down wearily and placed her hand on her growing belly. "Besides, if we paint the walls white, how will Newton differentiate between the black and white picto-cards and the wall?"

"Why not trash those dumb cards and just have Angela paint a black and white abstract mural?"

"I can't rearrange a mural." She frowned. "I could put the cards on top of a mural though. Do you think Angela would paint the evolution of man?"

"There will be no naked men or apes on the walls of my child's bedroom." He snapped the magazine shut and finally reached for a stack of paint chips. "How about blue. And what the hell do you mean 'Newton'?"

"Newton if it's a boy and Marie if it's a girl of course. Newtonia has a certain appeal too." Brennan mused.

He gaped at her. "I was thinking more of Luc or Sarah."

"Sarah?"

"From the bible."

There was an undignified snort. "I'd just as soon name the child Aphrodite."

"Green." He held up a paint card that was a pale ivy green. "Calming and nourishing. That's what our child needs."

"It is pretty." Brennan nodded. "We'll have Angela do a forest scene on one wall. Helen will adore it."

Booth tilted his head thoughtfully. "Or Troy."

Brennan smiled. "Lovely."


	3. Chapter 3

CH

"Bones, get out of here."

"I'm just checking on progress, you missed a spot over there..." She pointed.

Booth sighed. "I'm not done yet Bones, and you know you are not supposed to be around paint fumes it could be bad for the baby!"

"This is low VOC paint, Booth."

"Bren," Angela interrupted. "I want the mural to be a surprise remember? You have to leave now anyways, you said you'd watch Micheal so Hodgins could come and help Booth move your stuff over."

"I know." Brennan replied. "I just have to go to the bathroom again. It feels like Henry is tap dancing on my bladder."

"The joys." Angela smiled. "Don't forget, Micheal eats every fours hours, and you have to heat the milk by putting it.."

"In a bowl full of warm water." Brennan finished. "I know."

"Have fun with Thunder Butt." Booth called as Brennan left the room.

"Thunder Butt?" Angela glared at Booth.

He held up his hands in surrender. "Hey, I was there, I heard it. The thunder from down under was impressive for such a small person."

"Angela's son is very impressive." Brennan called from out by the door. "I'm going to teach him the alphabet today."

"Is she taking flash cards again?" Angela murmured.

"Yep." Booth grinned. "Laminated. Last time Mike chewed on A for Apple."

Angela grinned. "He does have excellent taste."


	4. Chapter 4

CH

"Booth, this heartburn is killing me!"

He put down his thai food and passed her a bottle of tums. "Thai food can do that."

"But it's never done it before!" She protested.

"You always had beer before to wash it down." He grinned. "Chocolate milk just doesn't cut it."

"Beer is not an antacid Booth, in fact it nearly doubles the amount of stomach acid in as little as an hour." She paused, picking up the tums. "However you are right and milk runs second to beer in causing acid reflux. I can't help it though, the baby wants chocolate milk." Brennan popped a tablet in her mouth defensively.

"Hmm, yes." Booth nodded seriously. "Just like last night, the baby wanted dill pickles cut up in cottage cheese, with a side of french fries."

"It was good! You should have tried some. Beau liked it."

"I'm not having a kid named Beau."

"Not even Beauregard?" She quizzed.

"Not even." He shook his head with certainty.

"Why not?"

He paused and stuck his fork in his noodles slowly. "I had a dog named Beauregard once. Good dog. He got hit by the garbage truck."

"The garbage truck? Booth, I'm sorry."

Booth grinned. "It was his own fault. Pops hadn't got around to having him fixed and there was this female dog... Well, they wouldn't get out of the way and the guy didn't have all day to sit around and watch puppies being made, so he kept going..."

Brennan stared at him wordlessly, before breaking out into laughter. "You're making that up!"

"No." Booth grinned. "After that we got Pepper. She was fixed before we got her."

"Pepper huh?" Brennan took another mouthful of Thai. "How do you feel about Pippa?"

"The greatest rear of the year candidate? Or the name?"

"The name."

"Not too bad. Is it short for something?"

"I'm not sure, Phillipa maybe."

The was a pause as they contemplated the name. "So hows that heartburn, Bones?"

She swatted him on the arm.

"What?" He laughed. "At least we know the baby will have lots of hair!"

"That is an old wives tale with unsubstantial evidence, it's just the Thai." Brennan glared at him halfheartedly.

"Uh huh." Booth grinned. "Sure it is."


	5. Chapter 5

CH

As the end grows near, her belly grows bigger. She begins to invest in cocoa butter by the pound and spends a lot of time staring dubiously at the fact she can now balance her dinner plate on her stomach when she is eating...

"Booth, look, I can my fork there too."

"Good for you Bones."

"How come you haven't gained weight?"

He frowns at her in confusion. "What are you talking about Bones? I'm not pregnant, you are."

"But some men have sympathy pregnancy symptoms and gain weight too. Are you not sympathetic enough?"

He pauses warily. "I work out at the gym a lot Bones, you know that."

She purses her lips.

"You look amazing Bones."

"I have gained thirty pounds so far Booth, I am five pounds over the recommended weight gain and I've got another month to go!"

"Water weight Bones, the doctor told you that, remember? It's all in your ankles."

"My ankles? You think I have fat ankles?"

"Sheesh," he mutters under his breath. "Bones, you have gorgeous ankles, they are just a bit swollen right now that's all."

"Like the rest of me?" Her voice wavers suddenly from annoyance to tears.

"No Bones, the only part of you that looks pregnant is your belly, people can't even tell from behind you know."

She pats her belly softly. "My belly and my ankles."

"Yup," he turns back to the tv. "And your boobs."

She hits him with a pillow before pulling out her shirt to look down it. "They are rather prodigious aren't they?" She smiles. "So much more sensitive too."

His eyes shift towards her and he mutes the tv. "Really?"

"Yup," She nods. "I think so."

"You think so... Well, maybe we should go test that out."

"Right now?"

"Yeah."

She places her hand on her stomach for a few seconds. "Well, the baby _does _seem to be sleeping..."


End file.
